Hmmm Mmmmm Good!

One pumpkin...

saved from our garden last fall.

Cooked yesterday...

equals delicious Pumpkin Pie Squares in May!

Cars...who needs them

Our one and only vehicle has been causing us some worry lately so we decided to be responsible owners and have it checked out before it died. We thought maybe that would help it be cheaper.

Yeah, right.

A rebuilt transmission and $2400 later it had better drive better. The mechanic is working with us as best he can by knocking off $200 and doing a lesser repair for free. I'm just glad that we could cover half and had good enough credit to take care of the other half. We'll knock that out quickly with Tom's overtime. I can't wait until our emergency fund is fully funded.

Another good thing is I'm not trying to get to work with a car in the shop. Between this and all the Relief Society business I've had in the last two weeks I'm glad I got out of that kitchen. I didn't need the stress from before or the added stress now.

I've found there's something about being stuck at home with no car. It's boring. Suddenly you think of everything you could be doing if you have a car. I've successfully channeled that into other things though. I've been knitting and today I figured out a better way to do the tatted alter cloth I've been wanting to make. It should be more durable and still pretty.

Life is good

It's amazing how much stress can take out of you. All week I've been enjoying the lower stress level. I've enjoyed all the Relief Society stuff I've been able to do without being stressed out before I even start. I'm going through in my mind what to tell the district. I have to be one hundred percent sure before I cut off any relationship. She finally gave me enough to reach that point. I've also dealt with enough abusers in my life to know that whatever I say will be thrown right back at me and I will not argue. I know I can't win a war of words, and I won't even try. I don't need to report her or tell the district anything to get past this and move on with life. I do feel bad for the next people in line, and a responsibility to them.

Change is welcome

Life has been pretty stressful this school year, but most particularly since I started my new job in January. I won't go into too many details, but the fact is that after four months the kitchen manager revealed her true colors and I hit my breaking point. Last Friday was the worst of all the days we've worked together and I decided I needed another school next year. Over the weekend I felt physically ill whenever I thought about going back to work on Monday. So, I decided to go back to the sub list for the rest of the year. It probably means that I'll have to stay on the sub list from here on out, but that's ok. I'm feeling like I am just about done with food service, period.

I've been very upset over this, to the point I've had trouble sleeping. The biggest thing that bothers me is that I didn't see the signs after all the times I've dealt with abusive people. I feel like a fool. I'll get past it, but it will take time. I know better than to bury the feelings. I have to let them out so I can progress to forgiveness. Right now I'm angry and embarrassed and I hope she gets some consequences soon. The district has to suspect something is going on when this manager has been through two assistants in one year.

But at the same time I'm counting my blessings that I'm not still in that situation and I'm enjoying my freedom.

So here are some of the fun things I did today and have planned for the rest of the week:

Slept in until 7:30 am

Ate breakfast and goofed off on the computer until 10 am.

Did Relief Society business.

Ran errands (and celebrated with lunch out)

Planning a trip to the temple

Will make more RS calls and do more RS business

Relax, relax, and relax some more.

It felt so good to not be stressed out today!

Breath...that's important

Today I tried out the mantra of a friend...

"I chose this. I chose to have children. I have good children." Repeated as long as necessary.

So, James, Hannah and I had a dentist appointment this afternoon. After work I called Hannah's school to tell them I needed to pick her up at 1:2o. Then I called James's school to tell them I needed to pick him up at 1:30. That secretary lectured me on calling earlier so she wouldn't have to interrupt his class by taking a note to him. I couldn't even get a word in edge-wise to tell her that I was calling as early as possible since I work at 7:15 AM. Then she told me that James was in the seminary building and I'd have to call them.

So I call the seminary building and they say..."James isn't here."

So then I'm thinking, my teenager is going off the deep end. He's ditching seminary. He's probably goofing off and getting into drugs. He ditched school and now he's lying, bleeding in the street somewhere and no one knows who he is. (Moms, you know how it is when our kids aren't where we expect them to be. We think of the worst thing possible.)

Needless to say, James didn't make it to his dentist appointment, and I was dreaming up all kinds of consequences for him.

And I started breathing deep and repeating the above mantra.

Finally, when James came home from school he had a legitimate reason for not being in seminary. Problem was he forgot when it was happening and therefore, couldn't tell me. Tim had us spoiled because he was always where he needed to be. John would come home late or this or that, but ALWAYS had a good reason for doing what he had done. We couldn't punish him for putting someone else first and helping them, etc. So, today with James...he had a good reason, his communication was the problem.

After talking to him about it all I told him that I'm happy that I have good kids, that when we have times like this I can trust that they have a really good, reasonable excuse and aren't just out bumming around.

Definitely, a not so good mom moment, although I did handle it rather well when he finally came home.

Thanks, Lisa, for the mantra.

Just a calm, relaxing day

Today was just about perfect.

7 am--ward council meeting

8 am--Tom made gluten free Swedish pancakes and orange juice for breakfast

8:30 am--Linda arrived

9 am--Church where we had wonderful talks, a great Sunday School lesson and I was able to attend YW with Hannah. Here's the gift Hannah gave me.

12:30 pm--PHONE CALL with Tim!

4 pm--Dinner with John and Laney, complete with the cheesecake I made for the occasion.

After hearing about struggles some of my friends are going through this was a perfect day. We are all safe, we were all together and enjoying each other's company. What more could a mom want?

New skills

California Rolls

The new two hour person at work is a lady from Japan. She is a real pleasure to work with, and we just adore her.

Last Friday she brought all the ingredients for a sushi making lesson. Here are my results...

I never knew sushi was so tasty!